Farewell and thank you, Oprah

I just finished watching Oprah's last show, a guilty pleasure for someone who is self-employed and able to justify an hour of TV as "research."  Like most of Oprah's audience, I was moved to tears by her farewell--humble, jubilant, grateful and victorious.  Most of all, I was touched by her emphasis on the role of God in her journey and her insistence that each one of us has a "calling."

For the past 14 years I've coached people through career transition and based on my own work with people who are finding (and sometimes fighting) a calling, I know Oprah's right.  We are designed by God to make a difference in the world.  I choose to believe that we have an opportunity to make a difference in the world through our vocations.  Some people may decide to express their callings through volunteer work, and that's okay, too.  But I believe we can make a difference and also make a good living, and it's reassuring to know I'm in good company with the likes of Oprah Winfrey.

There's a book that I recommend to my clients, Callings: Finding and Following an Authentic Life, by a gentleman named Gregg Levoy (www.gregglevoy.com), an author I had the privilege of meeting when we brought him to my church to speak.  Mr. Levoy's book is dense with references to spirit, theology, mythology, psychology and the mystery that we all struggle with when we choose to hear, then heed, our callings.  In fact, this book takes us through the stages of a calling, from the call to attention and receiving calls to invoking calls through things like art, pilgimages and dreams, then heeding or refusing our calls.  The book captures the immense responsibility and privilege of having a calling--and the perils of ignoring one.  I think that was Oprah's biggest gift, the permission to find our authentic selves and express that authenticity with others.

Today, instead of having guests on her show, Oprah stood on her platform and spoke directly to her audience and to the camera, calling on each one of us to find and heed our right work in the world.  She acknowledged her loved ones in the audience--Stedman Graham, her steady boyfriend; Tyler Perry, the actor and director who shared about his own sexual abuse as a child on one of her previous shows; and a small elderly woman who had been Oprah's fourth grade teacher, Mrs. Duncan.  It was Mrs. Duncan who gave Oprah what she had most longed for: validation that what she was, and who she was, was enough.  That's a message we all long for at every stage of life.

Throughout these past 25 years I've known fans of Oprah as well as detractors, those people who were disdainful of her fame and fortune or maybe just tired of her over-the-top media exposure.  I suspect that those who weren't comfortable with Oprah had a deep envy for all she achieved or maybe they just didn't like Oprah's philosophy of living out loud.  Whatever your opinion of the talk-show queen, the results of her work speak for themselves.  Her willingness to be vulnerable, to share her own childhood trauma, her loss of a baby, her up-and-down struggle with weight, made her a friend to millions all over the world.  As she left the stage today after more than 4,000 shows, Oprah's instructions were for us to find and then pursue our own callings. 

In my experience, your calling isn't buried so deep you can't find it.  In fact, I sometimes compare my work to that of an archaeologist:  I metaphorically take a soft brush and lightly brush away the layers over someone's heart.  Usually, that calling doesn't need to be excavated with the jaws of life.  It's right there.  Sometimes it takes a retreat, some time away surrounded by nature or solitude to hear that "small, still voice."  Other times, you just need a good listener.  And as Gregg Levoy writes, it isn't necessarily a happy ending once you discover your calling.  That's when the real work begins.  But living for a purpose, and living for others, is why we're here.  And that's the greatest gift of all.

Vickie Austin is a business & career coach based in Wheaton.  You can reach her at vaustin@choicesworldwide.com.